Virility Pills

Passing a Chinese health store recently, I spied a sign in the window. ‘Man Power’ was emblazoned on the sign. Obviously for increasing the strength of my arms I thought. I always wanted my muscles to be better at heavy lifting. Nothing of the sort. A nice Chinese girl/lady (c.20’s) darted out of the shop onto the street beside me and informed me, matter of factly, that the ‘Man Power’ referred not to upper-body strength, nor my arms. “They improve erection” she said innocently in a friendly Chinese accent. Ah! , I thought, Virility tablets, always wanted to try ‘em out but never got the opportunity, now my time had come.

I ventured inside the shop and immediately my nostrils were filled with a sanitising aroma, similar to the dentists but without the fear of drills present. The girl/lady (c.20’s) I spoke to outside was now joined by an older, female colleague who didn’t speak English. There for supervisory purposes, I thought. The tablets cost E50 for a packet of about a dozen – obviously my state supplied bank account didn’t stretch that far. However the nice young assistant must have been schooled in commerce for she soon had me walking out of the place clasping a nice authentic Chinese paper box containing precisely three Penis strengthening tabs costing E15. But I’m worth it!

How did the things work? Well I took one early one evening and nothing happened for a good while. By the middle of the night (c.2am) I was as hard as granite. Would my Penis ever be flaccid again? Could it be seen through my clothes? Walking may be difficult. These were the thoughts going through my mind. After about an hour or so, though, my erection had gone down and for the following 48 hours there would be after-shocks – plenty of quick hard-on’s that went on for roughly 10 mins each.

Some viewers of a sensitive disposition will be appalled at the unnatural stimulants used but, being single; it does bring its excitement. I’ll never have to wank again. No doubt the girl/lady, who sold me the tablets, probably thought I was married and that my wife was crap at foreplay. I called back to the health store a few days later to thank my Oriental sales assistant and there was mutual satisfaction. Unfortunately not of the sexual nature. It should be said that she was, as I find with most Chinese people in Ireland, diligent and professional in her manner. It’s hard to imagine an Irish person in the same position serving me without sniggering.

Nervous about its use, I would hesitate to recommend these tabs to just any man (most, like me probably wouldn’t need them but there still worth trying). You cannot account for the way a person can react to any sort of medication – I don’t want to be responsible for illness or death. However I found these “Man Power” capsules gave me much firmer erections and if any man experiences difficulties in that department they should at least investigate using the pills. They may save your marriage. I would say that dealing with Chinese staff is easier than the Irish: you haven’t got a clue what they’re saying and this helps lessen any embarrassment present. Now I’m off to get some more, I’m feeling horny, horny, horny……

Marching for Zimbabwe (December 2008)

The following article was written as a report. It was requested by one of my teachers in the college in which I am doing my Journalism course. A few months ago I attended and blogged on a similar march, however unlike my earlier blog this was a different march entirely and is done more in the style of a report.



Assembly at the Central Bank plaza was scheduled to be at noon. Initially there were only a few present but after around half an hour of organising the few had grown to roughly 50 activists and supporters. We set off for Leinster House with the instructions that we were not to chant political songs.

This march was organised to express solidarity with Zimbabweans currently going through a humanitarian disaster. Cholera has been responsible for hundreds of deaths and inflation is now at over 230,000,000 per cent. Our MC for the demo was a six foot Zimbabwean by the name of Leonard and he wasted no time in praising the Gardai who were allowing us to tread on streets usually reserved for traffic.

The march started at Dame Street and went through Nassau Street before making its way up Kildare Street and paused outside the gates of Leinster House as photographers swarmed around taking shots. We’d be world famous, someone said. More like a small photo tucked away in the Evening Herald, another replied. The congregation then quietened and a number of public figures addressed us.

First to speak, to the shivering listeners, was a representative of Trocaire. He was angry and made no bones in telling us about the outrageous abductions going on in Zimbabwe at the moment. In particular Jestina Mukoko’s disappearance was condemned and we were informed that life expectancy for women was 34 years of age and 37 for men.

Seamus Dooley (NUJ General Secretary) then spoke to the crowd and he said his union would be in contact with counterparts abroad to try and maintain pressure to allow a free, independent media – something not allowed in Zimbabwe at the moment. Mr Dooley was scathing of the authorities in that country and he pointed out the importance, to a democratic nation, of having a free press.

Leonard (our MC), then introduced Deirdre De Burca (Green Party) to the throng. She also spoke about the abduction, on 3rd December last, of Jestina Mukoko and we became aware of the climate of fear and hatred in today’s Zimbabwe.

‘A nation that was once the bread basket of Africa and is now a basket case’ was a phrase used several times by speakers. Eoin Ryan MEP (Fianna Fáil) recalled that he had a Fruit and Vegetable business in Nassau Street about 20 years ago. His best produce for sale at the time originated in Zimbabwe but Mr Ryan said that if he was selling the same food today it would probably be the worst quality due to the decline in Zimbabwe’s economy. He said that the EU is trying to tackle the Mugabe junta and make life as difficult as possible for the southern African dictator. Mr Ryan was greeted by cheers.

Joe Costello TD (Labour) assured Zimbabweans, and those concerned, that Irish politicians fully backed efforts to challenge the human rights abuses which has led to the exodus of literally millions of Zimbabweans from their homeland. Senators David Norris and Feargal Quinn were both outside Leinster House to lend their support.

Despite the cold weather, people were determined to holler their approval. ‘Thank you Ireland’ could be heard and after a few brief prayers we were implored to lobby our politicians and others of influence in Irish society. Action was needed to stem the Zimbabwean humanitarian crisis currently gripping the country. Many people only ate every three days and some were even forced to eat food made from cow dung to fill them, not something us Irish will have to endure.

Kildare Street, today, was bitterly cold but we should be all be thankful for our rights. Unfortunately not everyone is afforded the luxury of protest and the freedoms enjoyed by those demonstrating in Dublin today sadly do not extend to the streets of Harare.

After approximately two hours the crowd dispersed but with a renewed vigour in the continuing fight for justice in Zimbabwe.

Cocaine and Cannabis

It’s Saturday and no doubt thousands of people will be using ‘Charley’ (Cocaine to you and me) up and down the country tonight. Here’s what Dr Chris Baker, cardiology unit at Hammersmith Hospital, London says about ‘Coke’:

“Cocaine is a powerful stimulant with effects similar to adrenaline. It reduces the re-uptake of noradrenaline and dopamine at nerve endings, increasing blood pressure, making your heart beat faster and more forcefully, and increasing the heart’s oxygen demand. It can also make coronary arteries to spasm, reducing or stopping the heart’s blood supply, and makes the blood more sticky and likely to form clots. All of those things can cause chest pain or a heart attack.”

Not very glamorous. If people are going to use the stuff they should at least be informed about it. Having a damaged nose (like former Eastenders star Daniella Westbrook) could be the least of your worries.

On Thursday, 6^th December 2007 a top Irish model, Katy French, died in hospital. She was 24 years old. In the weekend before her death, Ms French had attended a house party where she became ill. In a Hot Press interview the model had admitted using Cocaine in her past: “Cocaine is everywhere but I just wanted to say that it’s not cool, it’s not attractive…”

It’s generally known that the drug in question is widely used among socialites in Dublin. Cocaine is highly addictive and can suppress one’s appetite – something of great concern to many young women these days. Furthermore ‘the Devil’s dandruff’ is illegal in nearly every part of the world where it is used in many social, cultural and personal settings.

In the Observer newspaper, recently, there was a supplement on drugs where several politicians were featured. They openly admitted using Cannabis. The drug’s classification is regularly reviewed by the British government and, according to an Observer survey, 32 per cent of all respondents believe the drugs laws, in the UK, are too liberal.

Drug use has become widespread and indeed you are looked upon as rather an oddball if you haven’t touched the stuff (ecstasy, cannabis, cocaine). However, as the Observer supplement says: ‘if any politician was exposed as a chronic junkie, his or her career would be over immediately’. So MP’s must be disciplined in their use but in the fields of arts and entertainment it is quite acceptable to partake in illegal substances. Although too many, in the latter occupation, have died in the pursuit of mind-altering drugs.

In Ireland there has been an upsurge in Head Shops and they are portrayed, by the owners, as being clean and safe places to try out what amounts to illegal drugs. In the media, if there is any discussion at all, it seems that Hot Press magazine has kick-started debate. Many of the writers at HP have either chosen to voice quiet support themselves or have interviewed people who have a pro-drugs view.

Let me be clear, by no means am I saying that all those who write at the famous Irish lifestyle mag are in favour of breaking the law. However they do seem to have, along with others in the media, an interest in bringing the views of users and dealers to readers’ attention on a regular basis. But in its favour the honesty displayed by Hot Press is admirable if nothing else. They have set the bar high and no other publication better informs the reader on the drugs issues in Ireland.

I know someone who has regularly taken cocaine and that person has told me that no-one ever speaks about why people take it. Could it be that it’s enjoyable? Why do most people drink alcohol, eat chocolate, smoke legal cigarettes, and sip coffee/tea? Surely the main reason for imbibing such substances is enjoyment.

However the enjoyment of taking drugs needs to be balanced against the dangers that can accrue from regular use. Not to mention the very real possibility of premature death. In Irish life, from Phil Lynott to Katy French, drugs have and will always be around. For the coming generations there will still be narcotics available and it is our duty to tell them the truth: not the Hot Press cheerleaders but also not the government nannies. There needs to be better ways of informing young people without alienating them. After that let them experience life on their own terms. We owe them the truth. It would be a serious injustice if we failed in that regard.

Television coverage of the 2008 Labour Party Conference

This week the Fás director, Rody Molloy, has resigned following the exposé of his over-indulgence in luxury, at taxpayers expense. Following Senator Shane Ross’s investigations, Mr Molloy angered the public. Many were appalled at his jetting around at a time when people are being laid off along with the economic downturn. He didn’t commit criminal activity, it’s just his extravagance has come at a bad time. Mr Molloy did his decent duty and, following severe criticism in the media, resigned. Fás, one imagines, has been rocked by this news. There will have to be reform implemented for people’s confidence to return to Ireland’s top employment / training agency.

It’s Saturday morn and the television is on. We are greeted by Michael D Higgins in his typical, forthright and fighting best. He is addressing the Labour Party Conference being held in Kilkenny. I have a lot of time for MDH and he has considerable experience in foreign affairs. It is a shame he was never a tenant in Iveagh House. He was wearing, what looked like, a hastily put on tie. Always a passionate speaker he spoke on the importance of the unity of the left in Ireland. I am non-partisan when it comes to Irish politics however I have long admired this Galway TD with his super-intellect. We need more people like Mr Higgins in public life. Bono once said he’d be ‘pissed off’ if MDH wasn’t in government. Not half as much as me, Mr Hewson.
Next to speak was Joan Burton TD. She spoke in rather sonorous tones but, like an abandoned car alarm, I got used to her siren. Opening her speech she told delegates she’d got her hair done (a reference to Mary Harney’s media hounding over her follicle expenses). Speaker after speaker addressed delegates and they included: Manuel Cortes (British Trade Unionist), Willie Penrose TD, Roisín Shortall TD and Joanna Tuffy TD.
Jack O’Connor of SIPTU talked, or rather preached, to delegates in an extremely passionate manner. Mr O’Connor was scathing of the current government. I thought his glasses were going to fall off, at one point, like a skier going off the piste. JO’C had a rather aggressive speaking style (similar to another Unionist north of the border). He angrily denounced the government along with the banking system. If the Labour Party was more powerful, a la Fianna Fáil, Mr O’Connor’s clout would be near insurmountable.

Labour has, electorally, a much lower attraction to voters. Around 20 – 30 seats in the Dáil is about as far as they can go. It’s the ‘glass ceiling’. The Irish people will be closer to the economic policy engineered by the likes of Charlie McCreevy (former Finance minister) rather than Labour’s economic doctrine. However left-wing politics is grounded in a political ideology that seems never to have been fully embraced by Fianna Fáil or Fine Gael. From the era of William Martin Murphy to that of Michael O’Leary, Labour has always stood up fro workers rights, even if they represent a minority.

I’m watching David Begg (SIPTU) speaking. He, like JO’C, sports a beard but is less angry in the way he speaks. Intellectual rigour appears to be his style. Indeed he’s considered and logical. I imagine he would be good at reminding a more right-wing government of its responsibilities. He politely tells those listening of the depressing economic outlook in Ireland right now. Mr Begg talks of the importance of Irish people to spend and spend (like Mr Brown’s fiscal stimuli in the UK). Keynes, as well as other economists, gets name-checked and Begg earns warm applause when he speaks of the ‘Credit Crunch’. He provides a clear analysis of the current problems – nearly everyone has their own analysis – that face the Irish economy and of workers rights. Mr Begg finishes his speech by quoting, scourge of the left, Donald Rumsfeld: "I used to think I was wrong but by then I thought that I was wrong to think I was wrong". He has the delegates reeling.

Of all those who spoke this morning the most impressive was Seán Sherlock TD. The Cork deputy opened a well crafted speech with reference to Marx (Groucho, not Karl) and delegates duly chuckled. Lean and well dressed, Mr Sherlock spoke clearly and finished his address by quoting from Billy Bragg’s book The Progressive Patriot. I hope and expect Mr Sherlock’s star to rise.

The news, this morning, is headed by the Taoiseach’s meeting with County Councillors. He may also need to listen to those gathered in Kilkenny this Saturday morn in late November 2008. There is a distinct chill in the air and I’m not referring solely to the weather. Economic matters demand attention and this conference is unlikely to offer Mr Cowen much respite.

Seeking Asylum

Think for a moment: General Cowan of Eireann-FF has ordered all the houses in Tallaght to be knocked down only for a select few to be re-built. Gen Cowan then allows members of Eireann-FF only to live in these re-built homes. What if Gen Cowan (of Eireann-FF) then decided Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) was to be acceptable in Ireland? After that perhaps Gen Cowan may decide that women who are guilty of adultery should have stones thrown at them, until they die.

The above scenarios will never happen in Ireland, however if they did it would make any reasonable person here want to seek asylum in another country. The department of Justice must take forms of Human Rights abuses, such as those mentioned above, seriously when deciding any application for refuge. For many asylum is the only option people have to live a normal life, in a country that recognises people’s rights. Our government should not be acquiescing with governments around the world that abuse Human Rights.

It’s not the fault of the Irish state that horrible events are happening in Africa (and beyond) however we should have a moral interest in accepting that those who come to seek asylum here are doing so to avoid torture and possible death. How can we, as a free democratic country, condemn Human Rights violations around the world and then on the other hand refuse refuge to those who need it. We must be consistent in our actions.

Bob Geldof was honoured in the 1980’s for alerting people to Africa’s problems, mainly famine. However Africa has far more problems than starvation. Political violence and despotic regimes have handicapped development. Want some examples? Zimbabwe, Kenya, DRC, Chad, Rwanda and many others I could mention are countries struggling to improve their development. You only have to read about these countries in the newspapers, on a regular basis, to grasp the scale of the problems being faced. These are just a grain of sand in the desert of complications that exist in the vast continent of Africa. But do we ignore our fellow humans there? Or do we try and give those seeking refuge some respite?

I’m sitting listening to some Ska tape I made years ago. ‘This is bliss’ I’m thinking. But there is a knock on the door: my sister, Eithne, is beckoning me to the radio. Marian Finnucane is interviewing Pamela, who is seeking asylum for herself and her two children, from Nigeria. She is trying to get permission to stay here and there are fears that the department of Justice in Ireland will send them back to an uncertain future in Nigeria.

Ireland has a limited reach globally however we should act in a caring and decent way to those (African or not) who seek asylum. By throwing out people who have gone through hell to leave their country we, Ireland, are saying ‘Yes’ to torture and inhumanity. It would be good if governments, no less our own, would understand the benefits of allowing people seeking sanctuary, away from harm. Of course anyone guilty of manipulation of our benefit system should be fully prosecuted. But not everyone trying to escape torture or death is interested in ‘fiddling the system’ here. We have the capacity to, and we should, offer our support to refugees and not reject them!

Film Review: ‘Sisters in Law’

When one thinks of women in public office Mary Harney, Angela Merkel and Condoleezza Rice spring to mind. Of course many other females have occupied political roles as well as in the fields of entertainment and in sport, all to society’s benefit. As a member of Amnesty International I come into contact with activists and a good portion are women. The example set by women the world over needs to be followed by men. Indeed most of the problems facing the world are caused by men. Men have done terrible things and it is a real shame that women are forced to clean up the mess us males have made. From sexual violence to crime and war, men have a lot to answer for and it often takes a woman’s intervention to make things better.

The film ‘Sisters in Law’ is one such manifestation of what has come to be known as ‘Girl Power’. The women featured are caring but tough and, as legal practitioners, command great respect. This fly-on-the-wall documentary set in the town of Kumba in the West African state of Cameroon, challenges abuses largely perpetrated by the men there: underage sex, violence…

In the opening scene the viewer’s attention is drawn to a man, a janitor, sweeping the floor of what looks likes a solicitor’s office and doing general cleaning duties. By contrast the judge, a woman, prepares her cases for the day ahead, for it is morn. The gender role reversal is staggering.

Vera Ngassa (State Prosecutor) is tough and she has a no-nonsense approach to the cases before her. One of the accused, a man, is brought before her on charges of kidnapping a child. After some moments of impatience with the defendant, she gives her judgement: “You men just harvest children all over the place without marrying the mothers”.

The S.P’s next case concerns the fear and upset caused by sexual violence. The S.P tries to reassure the victim. While the husband, predictably, denies the charges against him. The couple are Muslim and this complicates matters, so the case is taken to the town’s elders. The woman is implored to re-join her husband but refuses citing his abusive behaviour. She wants a divorce. Despite objections from her family she proceeds with the legal separation. As the film goes on the woman is eventually granted the divorce she craves and is jubilant.

Ms Ngassa’s next case is of a girl, Sonita (9), who claims she was raped. The accused, about 25 years of age, denies soliciting sex saying: “The girl came to my house and requested sex”. As fans are busily rotating in the courthouse, his excuses run dry. The intelligent S.P rejects his protestations of innocence and he is found guilty of the crime. Following his trial he is handed down a sentence of nine years with hard labour. After serving his time he will be deported to his native Nigeria.

The documentary continues apace with beautiful scenes of musty sand competing with the extremely colourful clothes of the local people and there are good signs of flora and fauna present. The poverty, however, can clearly be seen. Despite the lack of material wealth it is heartening that modern legal procedure is being employed in what is still an under-developed country.

A child, Manka, is taken to see the S.P. The child says she was beaten by her Aunty and an arrest for the female relative is ordered. There are marks all over Manka’s body. Following a medical examination of the eight-year-old child the Aunty, Lom Rose, is summoned to meet the S.P. Lom Rose admits assaulting Manka citing ‘provocation’. It transpires the young girl was beaten with a clothes line.

Manka’s Uncle is shown his neice’s injuries and is visibly upset by what he sees. Moreover this sense of emotion is shared by the local community. Lom Rose is wailing with contrition but it is too late – the damage and pain has been inflicted on poor Manka. Justice must run its course. Lom Rose is eventually found guilty on three counts of abusing Manka and gets a sentence comprising of four years in total, with hard labour. The camera follows Lom Rose as she tearfully tries to adjust to living, albeit temporarily, behind bars.

These female barristers are very impressive. It is clear that challenging religious/social traditions requires courage and tenacity. During one of the court hearings, featured in the documentary, a female lawyer says: “this century is one where women’s rights are respected”. That theme is obviously alive and well in this part of Africa. A palpable sense of ‘Justice being done’ runs throughout and it is sad that this is not replicated in more under-developed nations in Africa. One of the lessons drawn from viewing this DVD is that the men featured are brought to book for their crimes and not let off the hook, as happens elsewhere in the world.

‘Sisters in Law’ ends with a scene of a classroom filled with students. The class is introduced, by Ms Ngassa, to two Muslim women. We are informed that for 17 years, in this part of the world, there had been no convictions for ‘Spousal abuse’. Thankfully that has changed. These women were successful – they, bravely, brought their cases to court and won. The students give the women a round of applause. No man has the right to beat a woman – even in Cameroon!

This brilliantly shot documentary should be seen by everyone. The fact that it was entirely real makes it even more compelling to watch. If I had any criticisms it would be that there was very little evidence of Africa’s rich artistic culture depicted here. For Africa has indeed a deep heritage to draw from and I would say that the people of Cameroon must have more going on than just criminal activity. It would have been nice to see more of that in the documentary.

Not surprisingly the film, with its pulsating soundtrack, has gone on to win many international awards including one at the Cannes Film Festival. If I were Cameroonian I’d be proud of it.

An Accidental TD

During my early 20’s (the mid 1990’s) I wanted to work in retail and found myself training in retail sales specifically designed for people with disabilities. Some of my colleagues had more obvious difficulties than others but we all had a healthy respect for each other and this made co-operation altogether easier. If I had worked with people who weren’t disabled I would have struggled. So it was a wonderful opportunity to throw off the shackles of mental illness and put my increasing energy towards a future in retail. The course was due to run for two years and then I’d be as rich as Bill Gates and as powerful as a God. Unsurprisingly it didn’t turn out like that. During the second year’s training I was posted (almost like the army!) for a time in the Dáil and got to see some action (no, not combat).

At the time John Bruton was Taoiseach and the country was on the edges of the Celtic Tiger. Each morning when I arrived at Leinster House I’d collect the milk and wait for my superior to arrive and open the shop (An Siopa). Once open I would be given various tasks to do in the morning: Refilling the fridge, sweeping the floor etc. Usually at c.11am I’d be given a ten minute break and I would stride into the main building, over the plinth, feeling like a VIP. The main hall was adorned with portraits of all the Taoisigh that served the state down through the years. The ceilings were beautiful with chandeliers hanging brightly and it was, quite properly, palatial in keeping with the importance of Ireland’s national parliament. Going past the hall I then would walk down a long corridor which was arched (can’t help feeling it was modelled on Westminster).

As I approached the Dáil restaurant the clanking and banging of plates etc got gradually louder. In the morning there wouldn’t be too many politicians around but that depended on circumstance. Regardless of how many TD’s or Senators were present there always seemed to be a constant hum around the restaurant. Television monitors were perched from various angles allowing the patrons to view proceedings in both chambers whilst not having to leave their food/drink. Rehab were quite kind to us trainees and we were entitled to a small discount on some of the food available. The cook seemed to have a soft spot for me and I was regularly the recipient of an extra portion of desert with my meals (those were my fat years). Ah the pleasures of Leinster House.

Upon my return to An Siopa, after my break, I would be tasked with the responsibility of sorting the various newspapers and magazines that we sold whilst colleagues would swop with me and get their break. Gardai, TD’s, Senators, Journalists and Civil Servants would constantly require our services and at times the tiny emporium would be very busy (especially around 1 o’clock in the afternoon). I’ll never forget the image of Mary Harney parking her car and walking towards us in her track-suit (I wonder does she wear a hoody?) clearly she had a day off. Ms H never bought anything from us – those PD’s were always tight with money anyhow.

Regular customers included: Batt O’Keefe TD (now education minister), Seymour Crawford TD, Noel Treacy TD, John Mulvihill TD and the late Jim Kemmy TD amongst many others. Alan Dukes TD was still in politics at the time and he would have to bend his head to get inside the shop due to his height. My superior always went into a fit of giggles whenever the former Kildare deputy came in. She’d lock herself into the back room and I always was asked to serve him. A gentleman.

Cigarettes were what he wanted and Des O’Malley TD would also buy his ‘smokes’ in An Siopa but I can recall him being slightly grumpy and red-faced (not from embarrassment I’m sure). I think he was rather impatient, it might have come from years of trying to oust Mr Haughey. That would try anyone’s patience. All the same ‘Dessie’ was not once rude to me and I was never a great admirer of the former Taoiseach anyway. Although any political opinions, on my part, had to be suppressed understandably.

Mary O'Rourke TD swanned around like the Queen of Sheba. That woman was made for political life: one of the most gregarious TD's ever elected to serve, it's a shame she never became Taoiseach.

On one occasion I happened to be near the plinth when the late Niall Andrews, then an MEP, asked me to photograph himself and a colleague. I have always had enormous respect for the Andrews family so it was a pleasure to co-operate.

Senator David Norris – now there’s a colourful individual. He had chewing gum kept on credit and would pay a weekly sum to An Siopa to cover his expenses. Now in his sixties, I hope he continues to chew. The Senator would brighten the darkest of corners and he always had a rather cheerful demeanour. A stalwart of latter-day Irish Politics and academia it was always a pleasant experience to have the famous Joycean scholar darken the door of our retail outlet, as well as splashing some of his cash with us of course.

Another Senator who was a frequent customer was Feargal Quinn. The former supermarket supremo once had me counting Dáil and Seanad pens for a group of his guests who were visiting the Irish houses of parliament.

Sam Mc Aughtry was a Senator back then and although he had the excuse that he was rather elderly he was, I can recall, rather uninterested in conversation. A gruff Ulsterman, his appointment to the upper house was possibly an attempt by the government to appease Unionism. The so-called ‘Peace Process’ was extremely delicate then and so he may have to have been extra cautious with whom he spoke to, even a minion like me.

My time in An Siopa came to an end in January 1997 and I was to, later that year, take up a position in a record shop (a long held dream). However I look back fondly of my time spent in Leinster House and it’s environs. It was, and is, the nearest I’ll get to being a politician – not a career for me. It angers me when people blindly curse these public representatives. What about being on call 24 hours a day? The lack of privacy? They have to be accountable to literally millions of people 24/7. The TD’s and Senators may not always set the highest of standards from time to time but, by God they have a heavy workload.

So think about that next time you tell a politician to 'fuck off' when they come to canvass at your door. Remember: they are human too.

No sympathy for Ross, Brand

I have, reluctantly, decided to comment on this stupid, infantile story as I feel that no one is really thinking of the little people in the media sandstorm Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand have whipped up. Their careers will, undoubtedly, get back on track but it is the like of Lesley Douglas (the now resigned former Controller of BBC Radio 2) who has bitten the bullet. This whole saga is unedifying and, as I read in one of today’s newspapers, the BBC now has to decide whether to keep or let go of Ross.

JR is, unquestionably, one of the top broadcasters in the UK. But Mark Lammarr, Stuart Maconie, Sir Terry Wogan, Jeremy Vine and Steve Wright are all just as capable at radio 2. These presenters have large audiences. Wogan has literally millions of listeners and why should anyone, including the BBC, treat Ross any different?

I was once sacked from an unpaid position and if that was my fate, shouldn’t an overpaid broadcaster, someone with responsibilities to those they broadcast to, face the same punitive action? Is Ross above reproach? Well I don’t know many people who are paid £16,000 a day for what amounts to piss-taking.

This story isn’t worth commenting on at length – everyone from left-wing historians (Tristram Hunt) to right-wing ex-tabloid editors (Kelvin McKenzie) has made known their views. But it is as much to do with justice and fairness that in these times of recession and belt tightening (ouch!) the obscenity of bank rolling such ‘stars’ exists. The legacy of this sorry episode will rest on Ross/Brand’s paymasters and why these two celebrities are so royally paid.

The lesson should be: No one is beyond censure. Not Russell Brand and certainly not Jonathan Ross. Indeed both these jokers, at this moment in time, could probably buy and sell half of Africa. Andrew Sachs has had to suffer an insult from two of the best known broadcasters in Britain. This would be compounded if Ross were allowed to stay at the beeb. He should be booted!

A few words on the US elections

At time of writing Barack Obama is leading his Republican rival, John McCain, by 3 points in the latest polls in the US presidential race. Another huge boost (if any were needed!) for Obama was the revelation, over the weekend, that former US Secretary of State, Colin Powell will vote Democrat in this year’s election. It seems that for the first time in American history a black man will be moving into the White House, and that’s not as a Janitor.

Unusually for an Irishman, I’m not all that interested in US politics. Americans are it seems expression first and thought second. Maybe the ‘American Dream’ does a lot for people. Not my bag I’m afraid. It is the extremities and uncaring approach of the people that repels me from any fawning affection; furthermore it’s a place in which I would never consider going to: the prevalence of guns, the religious fundamentalists, the lack of respect for human rights and the arrogant approach to wealth over services I could go on….

Yet I am not anti-American, just glad not to reside there. In those respects, admittedly, out of step with most Irish people. We after all helped to build the US and Ireland has always had cordial relations with that country. I would not seek to change that fact despite ‘Rendition’, Guantanamo Bay, and the obvious shortcomings of the current administration. They have a very autocratic president at the moment and that will, almost certainly, change next January when the new president (of whatever party) is inaugurated. Even though no lover of the ‘American Dream’ I know that to ignore the US would be a mistake. My interest is minor; everyone knows that the world’s affairs are dominated by decisions made in Washington.

In so far as US politics goes it is human rights that interest me most and America’s attitudes towards them. There was a seminar in central Dublin recently, organised by Amnesty International, and I was struck by the lack of humanity in the US with regard to the death penalty (illegal in Ireland, a country with an economy a fraction the size of the US). We were told of the difficulties faced by black people if they are convicted for serious offences. Even if, years later, these people are acquitted, for offences that they didn’t commit, there are no forms of rehabilitation to help them return to society. If they are able to leave prison they have nothing to go back to (I’m reminded here of the film Shawshank Redemption, featuring the wonderful Morgan Freeman).

I was shocked by the US system – not everything is apple pie and cola. So whilst even though America has a fantastic reputation in terms of entertainment (Hollywood, Rock ‘n’ Roll etc) there are major flaws in society that everyone, both inside and outside the great nation, needs to be aware of.

Paying attention to the media, it is becoming increasingly clear that Mr Obama is on course to be the next president. If I could influence him it would be to try and change, positively, the way the US is viewed abroad due to the previous administration. Too much energy has been spent on damaging America’s relations globally. There has been a negative approach by the neo-Conservatives to US diplomacy. Indeed ‘with us or against us’ has been the battle cry from the current president and an inability to understand world affairs is something which many resent.

There should be no need for people anywhere to hate Americans and Barack Obama is well placed to, not only challenge, but to uproot anti-American sentiment across the world. For these reasons I would be happier, as a foreign observer, for Obama to be the next president of the United States. He may make the world a safer place to live in.

But what of Mr McCain? I have already made known my lack of interest and knowledge of the US electoral system, but the former Vietnam veteran may still have a chance of overcoming the odds and making it to the White House. Definitely his room for manoeuvre may have been narrowed by choosing Governor Palin of Alaska as his running mate, seems she scares a lot of people. But Senator McCain is a good-humoured, moderate Republican and, although his opponent has presidential qualities, McCain may well be the sort of fellow you could have a laugh with over a pint.

By contrast Obama is more serious in demeanour. In the end though the choice is with the American voting public. Only they can tip the balance either way. For it is they who will have to live with the consequences of who they vote into the White House when the results are announced on 4th November next. And no, I won’t be holding my breath.

MOTORHEAD – MY KIND OF METAL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_S_5n66cNo

Amnesty International is an organisation that warms the cockles of my heart. The problems in the Middle East, Burma and Zimbabwe would be unchallenged and possibly ignored but for the brilliant, hard working activists standing up for Human Rights around the world.

The warmth I have mentioned above also applies to the music I listen to, and there’s no better at spewing out molten lava Rock/Metal sounds than the British Heavy Metal band that goes by the name of MOTORHEAD. The vocalist, Ian Kilmister, known to all as Lemmy, growls out the lyrics like he was born smoking heavy tobacco and sipping neat vodka. If you add ‘Philthy Animal’ Taylor (Drums) and guitarist ‘Fast’ Eddie Clarke the band (the 1980’s line up) becomes a toxic tonic of tinnitus causing tantrums on a massive scale. HEAVY!

Some of the sounds that MOTORHEAD have slammed out over the years include: We are the Road Crew, Deaf Forever, Ace of Spades, Sucker, No Class, Killed by Death, Doctor Rock and my own favourite, Overkill, (with it’s false endings) are all devastating sounds which cement the band’s reputation for being not only the loudest and fastest Metal band, but also signal the lyrical deftness of those involved with crafting the songs. A MOTORHEAD song will stick in your mind long after the first listen and you want more and more and more and mo…..…

Lemmy is a colourful character, even if he almost always dresses in black. He has said that if MOTORHEAD were to perform near your house, your lawn would die. The band’s front man has a habit of collecting Nazi memorabilia, but it seems he isn’t a dedicated follower of Fascism (apologies to BILLY BRAGG).

One day, in roughly 1986, my Uncle came over from the UK to visit my family and he presented a 7” single by MOTORHEAD to my brother. Deaf Forever was on the A side and a live recording of Killed by Death was on the reverse. Well it was a great source of pleasure to my sibling and envy to me. How dare he own such an item of sonic sandblasting? Of course my brother has grown up and moved on from those days but I have made it my business to listen to MOTORHEAD on a regular basis either on the Internet or on CD.

A great sense of excitement comes over me whenever I put MOTORHEAD on the stereo. If you hear this writer playing their music it’s usually to attempt to banish negative thoughts. Who needs Heroin when Lemmy and co can send your spirits soaring? The great man has even said that he got a letter from a fan telling him that MOTORHEAD’s music led him to abandon plans for suicide.

Now living in LA, Lemmy is still active and shows no signs of slowing down although he was diagnosed with Diabetes a couple of years back. Of his ambitions, the Sexagenarian says: “Still haven’t fucked Halle Berry yet.” Quite a bawdy remark, it should be said that Berry is Diabetic too. So Lemmy you’ve already got something in common with the Hollywood star.

MOTORHEAD are touring constantly and have played in Dublin several times in the past. They’re due to appear in Dublin’s Ambassador venue on 31st October and 1st November next. If you’re not deafened after the first gig, you’ll definitely be stone deaf by the time the second night’s over. As Lemmy famously said: “You have to come to see us live if you want to hear MOTORHEAD properly”. Sorry Lemmy, I’ll stick to the stereo, but the sound MOTORHEAD crank out remains truly DEVASTATING!

NOTE: NO EARS WERE DAMAGED IN THE WRITING OF THIS ARTICLE. ALMOST.

JOHN PEEL: 1939 - 2004

From about 1985, until his death in 2004, I listened to 'Dr. Excitement' or to use his better known name: John Peel.

I loved his sense of humour ("I can't turn water into wine, but I can certainly turn Red wine into piss" was a favourite of mine) and his warm Liverpudlian accent. He never lost touch with his roots - he was a lifelong supporter of Liverpool Football Club.

For me John was a kindred spirit and he had many devoted listeners to his programmes not only on BBC Radio 1 but also on BBC World Service, Radio Eins (Germany) and latterly on BBC Radio 4, where he presented a weekly lifestyle programme dealing with primarily family foibles and it was called 'Home Truths'.

But it was his music shows that really impressed me: JESUS AND MARY CHAIN, THE FALL, BHUNDU BOYS, MUDDY WATERS, SAM "LIGHTNIN' " HOPKINS, THE SMITHS, RONNIE RONALDE, LONNIE DONEGAN, DICK DALE, THE RUTS, HEFNER, WHITE STRIPES and THE UNDERTONES (whose song 'Teenage Kicks' was his favourite tune of all time). He was responsible for championing possibly thousands of bands and solo artists and some of these people's careers sky-rocketed as a result of his support (MARC BOLAN/T REX, DAVID BOWIE, ROD STEWART, ELTON JOHN to name but a handful).

Peely's impact on the music world was profound and his programmes were a fantastic repository for music fans who had little or no time for the mainstream. It is often said that John was ahead of the pack when discovering new musical trends and everyone followed the great man. Indeed Hip Hop DJ Tim Westwood was still at school when Peel was playing the first wave of classic Hip Hop sounds in the early 1980's.

It is quite likely that my Vinyl, Audio Tape and CD collection would be less than half its size if I hadn't come across his programmes, first on my battered little red transistor on Medium Wave in the mid eighties and later through the pipe on crystal clear FM, beamed in from London.

Towards the end of his life John had been diagnosed with Diabetes and had put on a lot of weight. I can recall an amusing (as ever) interview he gave to 'The Independent' newspaper in the summer of 2004, where he joked about giving himself injections in public with Insulin and people thinking he was a drug addict.

That a man broadcasting from a foreign country many miles away could give me so much pleasure over the years was uncanny and I shall never ever forget the irreplaceable JOHN ROBERT PARKER RAVENSCROFT.

His memory shall stay with me till the day I die.

PUNK ROCKERS

It is widely believed that the music genre known as Punk Rock started in 1976 with the release of the seminal 'Leave Home' by the RAMONES. But at that time I was roughly 4 years of age and, like a lot of kids at that time I couldn't have appreciated the fuss.The SEX PISTOLS giving 'cheek' to BILL GRUNDY at prime time TV stirred up an amount of anger from middle aged people who viewed JOHNNY ROTTEN, and the like, as obscene in their words and actions.

So it was a sort of irony, a few years later in roughly 1979, that my uncle came across the Irish Sea from LONDON, to visit our family home. My dad had just got his hands on a brand new AKAI stereo and was getting acquainted with classical music and the pleasures of vinyl. Well my uncle TED (along with a guy from BELFAST, ROGER ARMSTRONG) had founded a record label in LONDON (CHISWICK RECORDS) and had begun (since c.1975) releasing 7"singles. When he came to see us TED brought over a couple of freshly pressed singles, one for me and one also for my sister: THE DAMNED's 'Smash It Up' was the title of the singles he delivered. It was the first slab of Punk I had ever heard and of course I wanted to hear the circular piece of plastic played on the new stereo.

At that point my father probably wished he'd spent his hard earned money on a LAWN MOWER or some other gardening implement rather than on the flash AKAI he had purchased. Definitely not a fan of PUNK. He's not exactly the sort of person who would have been pogoing to PUNK or blowing his nose on peoples shirts. A gentleman to a fault, my dad, and not impressed with the loud crunching obstreperous music being blasted out he grudgingly placed the vinyl on the deck and prayed for it to be over quickly (rather like a sermon on Sunday's).

As I say I was too young to appreciate what was going on at the time. However I did start listening to JOHN PEEL from about 1985 onwards and he played plenty of that sort of music on his programmes. He introduced me, and possibly thousands of others, to the likes of the RUTS, BUZZCOCKS, UNDERTONES and many other lesser known acts. In 1988 I came across a band that was to change my life: RAMONES. I managed to get and Audio Tape of the band which contained 30 tracks and I have never known a band to have as many great tunes as they recorded. I can recall jumping into my Dad's car while it was parked on the driveway and playing the tape on the car stereo over and over again with my brother beside me in the front passenger seat. It was the only way to listen to that kind of sound without annoying anyone.

I have been listening to PUNK for years and it has not lost its allure. What interests me, though, is the energy that loud, raucous music does to people. FRANK COTTERELL-BOYCE had a series (now over) on BBC RADIO FOUR and it featured characters (fans) that lived as young adults around the late 1970's. The five episodes are entirely fictional but they evoke the moments when PUNK was in the ascendancy. Each episode features characters who were present at an ADVERTS gig back in 1977 and it tells the story of what subsequently happened to each person since that time. A sort of rite of passage. Now in the noughties they have either had children or, as in one case, are in prison. I think that, even though the music was central to PUNK, there was clearly a culture present and PUNK fans from that time will be able to relive some of feelings and emotions of what went on then, by listening to, of all stations, BBC RADIO 4. Back in the 1970's PUNK would probably not have gotten any attention on that radio station - how things have changed!

What is it about that form of music that is synonymous with violence and rage though? I read, a few years back, in a football magazine, 'WHEN SATURDAY COMES', of a man, a hooligan, who would get an erection if there was any chance of violence brewing up at a football match. Now I suspect there was possibly some journalistic license there but, it comes back to energy which is a good thing, in theory at least. Life affirming. Whenever I listen to the likes of 'Hurry up Harry' or 'Suspect Device' I don't get stiff, but it certainly makes me want to jump about. Had I been around in the 1970's I probably would have been a quiet unassuming chap. Times certainly change and even though I LOVE PUNK music I could do without all it's accessories: Drugs, Pins through the nose, Leather jackets, spitting and urinating, dyed hair..... but not the energy.

Even though my parents hated everything about PUNK I could at least enjoy the sound. There is something wonderful about JOHNNY RAMONE's Mosrite guitar chopping away and also JAKE BURNS' (SLF) growling out vocals. I simply cannot get enough of the sound. Even though, admittedly, I would probably have balked at it back in the day. The media have sanitised it over the years but I find it difficult to get excited, in quite the same way, about other forms of music even though there is plenty of good music out there today.

Towards 1980 CHISWICK RECORDS folded and that gave way to ACE RECORDS and a myriad of other musical treats. Over the years, my Uncle would ply me with records. I received everything from 'Southern Soul' to folk music from MADAGASCAR, a marvellous musical education for me. But I could never get that noisy, scrawny, ranting PUNK out of my ears and still can't today!

Hard News

Dubliners have a large array of newspapers to choose from on a daily basis as well as on Sundays. Not only do newsagents supply the Irish titles but there are also many UK based papers sold here too. To add to that the main newspapers from central Europe (BERLIN ZEITUNG, LE MONDE etc) as well as the NEW YORK TIMES and THE WALL STREET JOURNAL are available to purchase. They give the impression of a shrinkage in the size of the world.

I was never terribly cool or hip as a teenager. A child prodigy? NO! But from the age of 13, or so, newspapers (particularly the British ones) fascinated me. Whilst my contemporaries were getting intoxicated on non-permissible substances, I was returning from the shops with the likes of the DAILY TELEGRAPH or the FINANCIAL TIMES under my shoulder. Indeed there was a time when each week I would explore the news stands for papers I hadn't bought before: TODAY (Eddy Shah's ultimately unsuccessful coloured tabloid), THE TIMES, the GUARDIAN, even (horror of horrors) the DAILY MIRROR. Travelling through the English countryside on election day 1987 I can remember reading the INDEPENDENT and enjoyed reading MILES KINGTON (RIP).

I bought the MAIL ON SUNDAY for a time in the 1980's as well fairly regularly. But as soon as they signalled their support for the CONSERVATIVES in the forthcoming election (1987) I knew I had to look elsewhere for my print fix.

Tabloids are usually short on detail and context preferring to publish celebrity gossip rather than hard news. They are usually fuelled by half truths, straying into people's personal, private lives. Anything to increase circulation.

The people of LIVERPOOL , en masse, have stopped buying the SUN as a result of printing untrue allegations concerning the city's football supporters. Following the HILLSBOROUGH football disaster (1989), in which some supporters lost their lives, the SUN claimed that LIVERPOOL fans had urinated on some of the bodies of the deceased - a sick slur for which the tabloid has since apologised, but has had little effect as most Liverpudlians refuse, even to this day, to buy the red top.

British politics, for me, is a very exciting scene to explore however, the UK's press, unfortunately, is biased. Open any British newspaper and you Will find that,far from being impartial, they support either LABOUR or CONSERVATIVE. In time of an election the press will, collectively, turn up the heat and add to the various debates being held. Furthermore most newspapers (tabloids as well as broadsheets) for most of the 1980's and 1990's were opposed to the LABOUR Party. This lead to the decline of SOCIALISM as an effective force in British politics and paved the way for 'NEW LABOUR' under TONY BLAIR. During this time the party's policies moved decisively to the right of the political spectrum.

One of the most galling facts about the SUN is that, as the largest selling paper in the UK, it has a huge influence on which party gains power at WESTMINSTER. RUPERT MURDOCH (the paper's Proprietor) isn't a British citizen yet he wields a great deal of authority over which party leader gets to step into 10 DOWNING STREET , as PRIME MINISTER, following POLLING DAY.

In IRELAND our newspapers are, I think it's true to say, more reserved in tone than those in the UK. No title would link themselves to any particular political creed: the reader is allowed to make up her/his mind on the basis of factual information distilled by the many fine journalists that this country is blessed with. It is hard to imagine THE IRISH TIMES resorting to sensationalist headlines, on the contrary it keeps everything it reports in full context and provides excellent analysis. It has a reputation as a newspaper of record - however dull it may be.

THE IRISH INDEPENDENT is slightly more colourful in comparison, but it still reflects public opinion in a concise manner. Former IRISH TIMES writer, KEVIN MYERS now writes for THE IRISH INDEPENDENT and he can be controversial from time to time. Lately he has caused anger in the AFRICAN community here by saying, in one of his articles for the paper, that the only thing that AFRICANS contribute to the world is AIDS. I think, whatever your view, it is good that such comments, in a free country, can be made. The right of reply is, also, just as valid. Readers have a right to reply and to add their points of view.

There was a time, years ago, when all the content of an IRISH newspaper was strictly news. Not anymore. On any given day, now, the papers have plenty of print devoted to SPORTS, FINANCE and ENTERTAINMENT as well as HEALTH/SOCIAL matters and, of course, a subject close to the hearts of many IRISH people: PROPERTY!

With the reduction in circulation, these days, most newspapers now have websites set up so that people can view their favourite writers and access vital information even when they are abroad and not able to get a physical copy of their newspaper of choice. This allows readers to scroll down pages rapidly online and it is becoming more and more popular. However there will always be a demand for HARD COPY. From swatting flies to mopping up spilled drinks, the physical use of a newspaper shouldn't be underestimated.

Social Event for the Zimbabwe Group

It was a sunny day in Firhouse last Saturday (27th September) when members of the Amnesty International/Irish Section/Zimbabwe Group and also some native Zimbabweans, not part of the Amnesty group, gathered for a Barbecue. The social event was enjoyed by everyone and there was an audible hum in the air from all the chatter. I met some of my Zimbabwean friends and others I had never met before and the atmosphere was relaxed and pleasant, sadly unlike what many millions of people are currently experiencing in that once prosperous land-locked southern African nation.

Even though there was an awareness of the awful hardships of the people in their native land, the Zimbabweans I talked to were in good spirits. One thing I have understood about Zimbabweans is the love they have for their homeland and there was a considerable amount of conjecture on the problems facing Zimbabweans everywhere (exiled citizens face difficulties too).

But the Barbecue was being held as a break from the heavy, daily worries of our Zimbabwean friends and no sooner had the charcoal been lit then we were all munching away at the food that everyone provided. Traditional Zimbabwean food was available for everyone to eat. I contented myself with the standard sausages and chicken breast with a smattering of salad. A wonderful time was had by all and by the end of the day everyone was filled with food and also with enjoyment. I was struck by the hospitality radiated by the hosts.

All of us from the Zimbabwe Group would like to extend our gratitude to Tendai and her family for hosting the Barbecue.

My Venues. Yours?

The BUTTON FACTORY is my favorite venue for live music. It has been in existence barely a year and in that space of time much has changed. Formerly the venue was known to all as the TEMPLE BAR MUSIC CENTRE. The changes brought about by last year's renovations have been radical and the sound quality is now much better. Previously the seating was uncomfortable, it now has quite relaxing furnishings for punters to enjoy. Furthermore there is a much more welcoming atmosphere generated at the venue, giving fewer and fewer reasons for people to complain.

Mc GONAGLES was a haunt of mine around the late 1980's in DUBLIN and they had a series of Saturday afternoon gigs (known as 'Live @ 3') specially suited for teenagers. The excitement of its cavernous interior along with the whiff of danger it provided plus the ear splitting volume enticed me to go and seek out this 'Parish Church', like many of my vintage no doubt. Along with 20 ballrooms in IRELAND, and the CAMDEN BALLROOM in north LONDON, an IRISHMAN by the name of BILL FULLER owned many venues globally. He died recently in the US (in his 90's) and was probably comparable to BILL GRAHAM (notorious US Promoter). FULLER also owned Mc GONAGLES and succeeded in making a fortune from operating venues across the US and beyond.

Another powerful PROMOTER, and also IRISH, is VINCE POWER. He started off by acquiring THE MEAN FIDDLER club in Harlsdon (North LONDON) and the name has become a strong brand name, as well as making POWER a millionaire. EAMONN DORANS is a great club in DUBLIN's TEMPLE BAR district and plays host to many newly formed bands. It is a showcase venue and I would imagine it is the perfect place for A&R people to frequent in the city. The toilets are to be avoided though.

But the doyen of DUBLIN's pub venues is probably WHELANS a place untouched by the excesses of glamour, it is intimate and holds a charm that few other music forums can compete with. You'll not always get top artists playing there every night but it never fails to warm hearts. Not a place to be ignored, they have now added an extra upstairs venue for more gigs to be accommodated. The Wexford Street venue is the beating heart of roots orientated music in DUBLIN.

Other venues of note here include: The OLYMPIA THEATRE (Dame Street), JJ SMYTHS (Aungier Street), The CRAWDADDY (Harcourt Street). The LOWER DECK (Portobello) is a place where I suspect all the staff have been issued with complimentary Hearing Aids due to the soaring decibel levels they have to endure. All manner of Underground/Garage/Punk/Metal/Noise bands are regularly featured in that venue - its a haven for anyone who enthuses about live music.

DIY music venues are growing in popularity and the latest such place to come under the CHRONICAL's radar is tucked away in affluent south DUBLIN, DEANSGRANGE to be precise. It goes by the name of the 'HIDEAWAY HOUSE' and is literally a residential dwelling run by a Punk collective where bands come to put on gigs. On a recent visit I was met by some of the people organising the 'gaff' (mostly aged under 25) who are very motivated and local Indie/Punk musicians are always welcome. The ethos is entirely positive and admission is usually very reasonable. I'm a big fan of collectives and the whole DIY culture. For fans, by fans so everyone benefits.

That concludes my round up of, what I believe, are some of the best venues on offer at the moment in DUBLIN. You may differ in your choices but that reflects the vibrant, exciting times for music in our capital city currently. Long may it continue.

Sounds Of The 1980's - My Youth

I am inside (where else would you be with the current weather) listening to 'George Best', the first LP by THE WEDDING PRESENT, and it bristles with energy and excitement. What a pity they and many other bands, it must be said, no longer energise nowadays. Back in the 1980's it seemed that nearly every band that bothered to cut a record had to be heard: SMITHS, HOUSE OF LOVE, SPACEMEN 3, MICRODISNEY, STARS OF HEAVEN, MEGA CITY 4, SENSELESS THINGS, I could go on and on. The music emanating from cities across the UK (and further afield) was the noise annoying the shit out of our parents. Sexually inhibited boys had, at last something to latch on to. It was a kind of release valve. MORRISSEY's hugely over-subscribed free (if you wore a SMITHS or MORRISSEY T-Shirt) gig in the Wolfrun Hall, Wolverhampton c. 1989, was an example of that valve in perfect working order. If you were sexually confused, or in any way lacking in confidence, MORRISSEY's 'asexuality' was a breath of fresh air. You were not alone.

For me my saviour was a DJ, JOHN ROBERT PARKER RAVENSCROFT, better known as JOHN PEEL. I have a blog on him prepared for publication in the 'CHRONICAL' scheduled for later this year, so I'll keep my words on him here to a minimum. Peely was on between 10 and midnight on Monday's, Tuesday's and also on Wednesday's. He was a joy to listen to. Of course he obsessed over some awful music, but many artists he gave 'Needle time' to made some wonderful sounds. A good proportion of the music he championed (too many to mention here) remained in obscurity however the charm was so appealing to a sixteen year old listener like me.

Television, these days, isn't kind to music but in the 1980's there were a number of programmes set aside for 'sound enthusiasts'. Most famous would have been 'THE TUBE' on Channel 4. Even that show had a mainstream ring about it. Presented by BOB GELDOF'S ex wife, PAULA YATES, alongside co-presenter JOOLS HOLLAND, THE TUBE was made in NEWCASTLE but was a hub of entertainment for teenagers everywhere. Most of the music covered on the programme was quite homogeneous, however it had its moments. I can recall PAULA YATES swooning over TERENCE TRENT D'ARBY (eighties pop singer). Indeed any slightly good-looking male musician at the time, that appeared near YATES, rarely escaped her amorous attention. By the end of the 1980's 'THE TUBE' was history.

I started to buy my first records around 1988. ARETHA FRANKLIN,UB 40, ELMORE JAMES, BOB WILLS, LOOP, JESUS AND MARY CHAIN, NANCI GRIFFITHS, STIFF LITTLE FINGERS and BILLY BRAGG were just some of the people whose records made their way to my battered DANSETTE (bought in the summer of 1988 at a car boot sale in the East Midlands, UK for £4). It was exciting to grow up with these sounds around me. If it had been in the 1940's the sounds would probably have been bombs exploding. COMET (RIP) and FREEBIRD Records were two of my haunts at weekends. Both shops were heaving with records and my constant efforts to locate LP's that PEEL had played on his shows were usually fruitless. It became a challenge to me and eventually I would start to find some of those records.

DAVE FANNING (RTE) also influenced my aural passions. Hearing him play DINOSAUR JR.'s 'Freak Scene' for the first time was an epiphany and I made it my duty to get the band's recordings. However at IR£9.99 I had to wait and then got it years later on CD (!). People go mad about NIRVANA (US) but I would say that the 'grunge' band of most importance at the time was MUDHONEY. The latter's 'Touch Me I'm Sick' and TAD DOYLE's 'Saltlick' mini LP were some of the better records in that genre in the late 1980's.

ANDY KERSHAW was (and is) a legendary broadcaster and I can well remember buying an LP by 'Zydeco' musician, BUCKWHEAT ZYDECO and his masterly talent on the Accordion after ANDY featured him on one of his shows on his BBC Radio show. I have amassed a good number of African LP's (and CD's latterly), one of my most treasured is 'Shabini' by THE BHUNDU BOYS from ZIMBABWE. Its a perfect example of the shimmering guitar playing they were famous for in the mid eighties. The energy of the 'Soukous'/'Jit Jive' styles they created was compelling. Had it not been for my access to 'Medium Wave' on my little red transistor, I got as a Christmas present in 1984, I may never have bothered with music to the extent I did.

Buying LP's was an event for me. Because I had no income I relied on the odd fiver (or tenner if I was lucky) from relatives at times like birthdays and Easter or Christmas. Typically I made the journey into central DUBLIN at the penultimate day of the school holidays so as to have something to look forward to before my studies resumed the following day. The decade in question was a time of economic hardship in IRELAND but musically it was quite exciting. One of the small clutch of Irish bands that I loved (and still do) was THE GOLDEN HORDE. I would spend my days in school telling anyone who'd listen about them. When I got home I'd play the 2 or 3 tunes by the band that I had taped off the radio. One of my enduring pleasures was pressing the 'play' button endlessly and telling myself: "The homework can wait."

So the 1980's were my 1960's - a time when music could ease the horror of school and I dreamed of working in a Record Shop. 'Maybe I could work in 'ROCK ON' ', I thought, but it didn't happen. 'I 'll have to see about 'GOLDEN DISCS'. my dreams would have to wait to become a reality and sure enough I fulfilled that longing and in 1997 (starting to sound like 'This Is Your Life') I found myself working behind the counter in a DUBLIN based record emporium, TRINITY RECORDS where I extended my knowledge of music both business and artistically. However the 1980's was when my dreams began - a time in my life I'll never forget!

BRIAN COWEN - Our Best Ever Taoiseach?

Is BRIAN COWEN our best ever Taoiseach? Well I'm not sure yet, but I'm not sure that he's that unpopular either. He has had responsibility for other roles in government such as: Health, Foreign Affairs , and latterly, Finance. Alongside that breadth of experience he is one of the most popular TD's in the country, he regularly tops the poll in his constituency of Laois/Offaly and his party colleagues make much of his sense of humour - something that I, and I suspect others outside the political arena, was not aware of.

Public life in Ireland has been hit, in 2008, with the death of such talented people as NUALA O'FAOLAIN and RONNIE DREW and we are the poorer for their passing. Another outstanding individual who died recently was SEAMUS BRENNAN, a tireless servant to the Irish people and a well loved politician. I thought that the immediate response of BRIAN COWEN was dignified and showed that he was human and not an unemotional politician. It was at this point in his premiership that I realised that here was someone not immune to expressing his true feelings, there was no apparent reticence displayed. Other Taosigh, most notably CHARLES J HAUGHEY, wouldn't have been as honest as COWEN and our current leader is not afraid to tell it as it is. Its his style.

Since the end of the AHERN era, the 'SUNDAY INDEPENDENT' has been in a miserable huff. Mr COWEN hasn't been clasped to the metaphorical bosom of the weekly newspaper. Frequently he's the target of criticism over the handling of the economy and other issues. A lot of that criticism may be well founded, however I get the distinct feeling that AENGUS FANNING, EOGHAN HARRIS and others at the paper are distraught at AHERN's departure from office. The 'Bass' swilling gentleman from north Dublin has been replaced by the tough-talking man from Co. Offaly. Mr COWEN is not thought of as being good copy on a Sunday. Maybe a rival newspaper will be more sympathetic.

EOGHAN HARRIS says that BERTIE AHERN brought a tear to his eyes when the former Taoiseach addressed the gathered parliamentarians at Westminster a couple of years ago. Well I have never felt emotional at anything uttered by Ahern. He doesn't like to ruffle feathers - unlike Mr COWEN, who is more frank in his assessments of the problems facing the country. He doesn't mince his words (an example was his use of an expletive in the Dáil shortly after becoming Taoiseach). Unlike HARRIS I prefer BRIAN COWEN to BERTIE AHERN precisely because he genuinely gives a damn about the issues he has to work on. He's not afraid to walk on some egg shells to do his duty. With BERTIE you liked him, but what did he believe in?

With the current economic crisis BRIAN COWEN will have his hands full. Can he bring us through the turbulence successfully? Well we may find out in due course. I have confidence that 'Biffo' will do his best to take the state out of recession. He may appear arrogant to some but at least he has the robust political attitude which his predecessor was bereft of. Many may feel he isn't up to the job but I would caution against such analysis. He doesn't need motivatoion as a leader, even if he, at times, makes EAMONN GILMORE (Labour leader) look like BILL CLINTON.

I for one respect Mr COWEN and have a strong belief in his sincerity. Now BRIAN, if you could only wear some less ill-fitting suits..........

Seasick Steve

Its late March, 2007 and I'm in the Virgin Megastore in London's Piccadilly. One of my purchases is an album called 'Doghouse Blues' and it's by a guy going by the moniker of Seasick Steve. He's an American hobo musician in the Blues tradition. Oh what delights a trip to London throws up!

Back in Dublin, two months later and I'm ensconced in the Crawdaddy club awaiting the arrival of Seasick Steve for the first Dublin gig of his tour, Digital camera at the ready to take a few shots of the Mississippi - born artist. I manage to creep up to the front and am able to capture Seasick in his natural environment playing his heart out for the packed audience.

An unconventional arrival is in store. Instead of coming onstage from the back, he strolls through the crowd assembled, almost biblically, strumming his guitar. My snapping starts in earnest. Seasick's voice is amazing: sounds black and lived-in but he's as white as a sheet to look at. The most important factor though is the sheer sincerity the man transmits. He rambles about the guitar he bought and of his recent heart attack. Women, of a certain age, are warned not to get too excited whilst he removes his shirt to reveal a goodly number of, what I would classify as tasteful, tattoos.

Well the gig went well and I very soon became aware 0f Seasick's music. He's played here in Ireland a few times since that hot and sweaty night in the Crawdaddy and is building up an avid fanbase here. Interviewed in the current issue of Hot Press magazine, he has now, according to the article, signed to a major label and there is a more than good chance of remaining on the label too. With his latest release imminent (I Started Out With Nothin' And I Still Got Most Of It Left).

Of the new recording he says to the fortnightly magazine: "The title refers to how I started out with nothing and how that feeling is still there - it don't matter what you take away from me because I 've still got what I came with." Which reminds me I've still got my Digital Camera with some fabulous pictures that I'll treasure of the Seasick Steve gig I attended, live in Dublin (May 2007).

If anyone is thinking of going to see the good man my advice is to go. There's not many Blues musicians alive today and I can say it was a very special experience to witness a Seasick Steve gig. A word of warning, ladies, try not to get too excited if he decides to take his shirt off!

Helping To Destroy Saint Stephen's Green

Paris has the Eiffel Tower, Rome the Colosseum and London Big Ben. But what does Dublin have to rival those big cities? Not the spire, not the GPO. My choice of landmark would be Saint Stephen's Green. An area of city park, perhaps the finest in Europe if not the world. There you can stroll around, ly with your girlfriend/boyfriend in a relaxed position. Or, if you're elderly, simply sit in one of the many benches provided. I have very fond memories from my childhood of being brought to 'the Green' and of the climbing frames - a source of endless joy to any child. Yet all that idyllic fun that Dubliners have enjoyed is set to change utterly (to misquote WB Yeats).

For in this week's edition of SOUTHSIDE PEOPLE there is a shocking story that has shaken me out of my comfort zone: "Planners intend to dig up the entire northwest corner of Saint Stephen's Green (SSG) in order to build a proposed underground train interconnector. Consequently, most of the lake will be destroyed and over 40 mature trees in the park uprooted to make room for construction" the article, written by MICHAEL MOLONEY, says. The pleasant strolls will become unpleasant tramping about, avoiding plenty of muck and dust no doubt and I haven't even mentioned the noise - the opposite of what should be a peaceful relaxing environment to all.

"It would have an irreversible effect on SSG. You cannot simply dig up a whole quarter of the park, then rebuild it", says NOEL ROCK, organiser of the SAVING OUR GREEN campaign group. Would the Egyptian authorities treat the Pyramids this way? JIM QUINLAN, Chief Architect, RPA (Railway Procurement Agency) even says: SSG can't go back to exactly how it was" It is man-made destruction we're talking about here. If the drilling and digging goes ahead tourists, never mind the locals, will be turned off going to what is surely one of the most tranquil public amenities we have to offer in the city. It would be a tragedy for everyone.

Not only will the park be effected but also the wonderfully imposing 'Fusilier's Arch' will have to go. Built as a tribute to dead servicemen who went into battle, I feel it's demise, however temporary, would be disrespecting Dubliners both living and dead. All in the name of better public transport. Money. Mr Rock is quoted in the article as saying: "There is so much potential for something to go wrong. Monuments like these cannot be rebuilt and SSG is a timeless monument in itself."

Hopefully the developers will see the folly of their ideas by not going ahead with this destruction of our heritage. NOEL PURCELL (famous Dubliner, actor and singer) would turn in his grave if he heard of the rape of the well loved city park. It would be a disgrace if it went the same way as Eyre Square in Galway which is now a shadow of what it once was due to developers literally mucking about and ripping the heart out of the City of the Tribes.

Mr Rock finally states at the end of the article: "Locating the (Metro) station underneath SSG is simply the easy answer for developers". I know what I'd like to put underneath those 'developers' and it wouldn't be painless. Everyone must be mobilised to stop this madness. I know how I feel. How about you?

Dun Laoghaire Festival of World Cultures - Day 3

Welcome to the third day's coverage (don't worry its not Cricket). The sun is out and we are being treated to a taste of summer which we were starved of up until now. Traffic, as you can imagine, has presented people with problems. For once its great to be a Pedestrian. My journey (seemed more like a transatlantic one) was being delayed considerably and the familiar sight of buses with "Out of Service" was repeatedly seen. Was I ever going to get to DL?

When I finally got there I walked through the centre of the town and eventually I settled in Harry's Café where I sat and enjoyed my Cappuccino whilst two attractive German ladies, beside me, were nattering away in their native tongue. I had a few ideas where to put my tongue but then this is a family blog. Just for the record they're staring at me like I'm COLIN FARRELL. Such is the sex appeal I exude!

This part of the country has now got a rather high proportion of Latin souls around the place and the Spanish accents are now as common as the Dublin whine. DAVID TRIMBLE once stated, in a speech, that the Republic of Ireland was monocultural and backward. We may be a little slow to change in the world of enterprise but to call us 'monocultural' is, quite frankly, a wee bit of a joke. Come to DL, David, and maybe we can remove your head from the sand of ignorance where it has been stuck for far too long. Apart from European accents INDIAN, CHINESE and AFRICAN voices are all to be regularly heard here and it is something to be cherished. I feel the festival, here in DL, has boosted the place culturally as well as economically. Anyway I'm now off to see what Sunday's events have in store......

I'm sitting near to the waterfront adjacent to the main stage (Newtownsmith) and there is quite a Smorgasbord of activity in the area. From Pupetteering and Face painting to Henna Tattoos, where people can be the victims of body art. Everyone is strolling around or lying, listening to the music being performed. All are in good humour. The Garda are not to active. Falun Gong followers are giving out newsletters speaking up for their sect, denunciating the Chinese leadership. Reading through some of the literature, I was handed, it is clear that today in DL we are blissfully unaware of the Human Rights horrors that are happening as I write. We are so lucky.

Seems every second woman who passes me looks like she has been plucked from the cover of Vanity Fair or Heat Magazine. They're gorgeous! For a single guy like me my neck has been strained from the twisting and turning of looking at the beauties near me. I was thinking about Newtownsmith last evening: Would it be like Glastonbury, lots of muck? Thankfully this wasn't the case. The ground was dry enough but one woman, I spied, got up from the grass and had two damp patches on her bottom. I, wisely, restrained myself from asking her could I photograph her.

If, as in 'The Committments' film, the Irish are the blacks of Europe surely DL people are the hippies of Ireland. Every sort of beatnik has come along: Dreadlocks, Tattoos, Piercings are prominently in view and I would say that the music being heard compliments the styles here. The din is getting a little dull so I'm moving on...

I've made it to 'Walters', an old haunt of mine. But not before jiving to the sounds of Nigerian band, MOTENA at the Peoples park. This is probably my favorite musical event of the weekend. The shimmering guitar tones make it a very exciting 10 minutes. Unfortunately they were playing their last few tunes when I got there. But it was wonderful to witness them. The energy was palpable.

As I thought, Sunday's programme was the pinacle to the festival. We were also blessed with fine weather on the last day, which gave the proceedings a continental atmosphere. With each passing year the event becomes steadily more diverse. Can JODY ACKLAND bring us any better? It will, I'm sure, be a permanent fixture on the local calendar for years to come. Our very own Notting Hill.

Special mention must go to a lovely Spanish lady I met whilst leaving the festival this evening. Elena, it was a real pleasure to be in your company. I hope that we meet again and that whatever you do in your life - you are happy and well. Cheers!

Dun Laoghaire Festival of World Cultures - Day 2

Arriving in DL to see the second day of the great annual day, out for the citizens of the famous seaside town, we were greeted with rain and my corduroy jacket and trousers were very quickly as wet as a ducks bottom. You could well imagine, in such circumstances, a degree of disappointment however no one I saw exhibited such emotions and peoples spirits remained undiminished. County Hall was my destination where I had volunteered to help out at the Amnesty stand. My presence was welcomed by my colleagues but, as there were enough members there, I didn't need to stay for long.

Before I left the hall, though, I had a look around the place and there were plenty of different stands each representing their own organisation. As well as Amnesty there were: Trocaire, Vegetarian and a number of environmental groups in the concourse. Paul Cunningham of RTE gave a talk to those gathered to hear what he had to say on how we can save the planet. A tall order but definitely worth a try. It is heartening that such people care about this pressing issue which will inevitably affect us all.Traffic was heavy, unsurprisingly, and parking your car would require a detailed plan of action. After the County Hall I went over to the Pavillion for a look.

There was a group of Indian men wearing what looked like traditional costume and were most cooperative when I asked to take a photo of them on the Digital. Around the vicinity of the Pavillion there were people serving up food. Not your usual burnt chips or undercooked burgers here. Everything made for tasting including Vegetarian pies and spring rolls. The mouth would water in anticipation. The stereotypical image of Indian food is spicy mouth burning fare, but there was a number of delicacies for people to try as well.

Tonight's headlining musicians are BANAYA (west African Griots) and they are due to appear in the Pavillion theatre at 9pm. All World Music enthusiasts will be excited. The blurb states: "Orchestral Malian compositions and Senagalese Mbalax unite with powerful Gospel voices." The second day of the festival may have been conducted under wet conditions but we can, at least, be dreaming of a west African climate whilst listening to the wonderful music.

More tomorrow......

Dun Laoghaire Festival of World Cultures - Day 1

Dogs evacuating their bowels on the pavement, youths drinking cans of 'Royal Dutch' in the local park, gypsies flogging tatty jewellery near the church area and heroin addicts staggering around, having just got their daily supply of Methadone in Patrick Street. A typical afternoon in DL. Along with the sad loss of RONNIE DREW at the weekend, not to mention the wet weather, DL needs something exciting and vibrant to lift itself out of the gloom.

Each year DL hosts the Festival of World Cultures and it is an event like no other in the Borough. The area has suffered commercially in recent years and the influx of thousands of people this weekend should do much to redress the balance. For a weekend at least.

So here we are on Friday @ 13:51 and I'm ensconced in Costa Cafe. A 'Skanger free-zone' I always think. It's quite unlikely that many of it's patrons will ever see the inside of the nearby Social Welfare office. However I'm probably the exception to that rule. Writing this, I have just been out and around the centre of DL and not much seems to be happening at the moment with regard to upcoming festival. However most of the action will start in earnest tonight.

ORCHESTRE NATIONAL DE BARBES at the Purty Kitchen and ETHIOPIQUES will be performing in DL's prestigious Pavillion Theatre. Just two of the highlights from the Friday night schedule.

Quite a lot will be going on here and even though its quiet now, you can expect the whole place to be heaving over the next couple of days. Top of the list of things to avoid however, will be the Jewellery vendors around for the festival - extremely rude people who deserve no business and with any luck they'll get none.

I'll be reporting here further from the festival tomorrow when I hope to be sampling some of the nightlife on offer among other delights just waiting to be sampled. Well the excitement is starting to build. Either that or my Cappuccino has lifted my spirits. Oh and Ireland have won medal at the Olympics.

More tomorrow......